Every day the past seven days, I've awoken after 8am. I've played Halo. I've made breakfast. I've had breakfast made for me. I've heard Tim Timmon's song Christ In Me played for me on the guitar at least three dozen times. I've stayed up until 2am. I've researched men's fashion. I've watched movies and played board games and juiced and gone to the Farmer's Market.
I have not clocked in at work since last Thursday.
For personal reasons, I've taken a leave. I haven't quit. It's complicated and it's been a long time coming.
The first couple days, I alternated between feeling wildly, deliciously free to feeling absolutely nauseous. What about bills? What about money? What about my reputation and future and what will people think of me and........
This seed was planted months ago and now it's time to bring it into the sunshine.
I'm done doubting and playing it safe. I'm done playing the game.
It is October.
It is a time to start over.
It is time to start living my life. I mean, for real.
Taking that plunge I've been talking about and alluding to for the past few months.
I'm getting a part time job or maybe a full time job but only m-f daytimes... I'm leaving nights and weekends open for photography.
I signed up for Perfect Wedding Guide. I made a promo video. I sent out en email with a Free Engagement Session Promo yesterday.
Today, I've booked three photo shoots and set up consultations with four brides.
Door after door is opening before me. Fears and doubts and disbeliefs are dropping aside. That nauseous feeling is gone. In it's place is genuine relief and wonder.
Sometimes the most horrible circumstances and changes in life can be used for good.
It is October and a new chapter has begun.
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