Life. . .

What is life? Is it made up of amazing moments and then the notsogreat ones? Should I be contented with the valleys and peaks of life? Should I settle for respectability without passion? Contentedness without question? Predictability without fear of the unknown?

I had a conversation a couple weeks ago. It was about my fear. My fear to close my eyes, spread out my arms and jump. I was speaking of my mom. About how she's never been afraid to do these things yet it hasn't always worked out for her. Some of her life decisions have led her down some harmful paths... life choices I myself don't want to make. I want to learn from her life. Take the good. Avoid the bad. In my situation, how can I tell the difference? I was told by my friend that I need to quit fearing my mother's life and live my own. He said that yes, sometimes bad things happen as a result of our choices but Everything Happens For A Reason.

Can I believe that?

I try.

Today was a good day. Some days aren't good. Some days everything falls in line and I feel One with the Universe and I know my place and it is good.

Other days, not so good.

That is life.

But today. Today, I know in my heart of hearts what reality is for me and while it isn't perfect by Hollywood standards, it's clear enough for me to rest on it and be contented in my own way. I don't always understand myself. I don't understand the music video to Mumford and Son's "The Cave" but I still think it's awesome and funny and perfect.

I don't know what the future holds. I just know I want to ride each wave as it comes. Take each run as I find it. Take each moment. Take each breath. Relish in the now.

They call me a hippie. Maybe this is what they mean....



'Cause I need freedom now
And I need to know how
To live my life as it's meant to be