On the Fringe

I wonder.

I've been dating.

And I wonder how long it will take. I should really just put it out there. Focus and all that. Be myself.

But in reality, I'm kinda messed up. I'm kinda out there sometimes.

I like to paint. At midnight. After a couple glasses of wine. In the basement. And I tend to get paint *everywhere*. Who can deal with that?? Who is really Okay with that?

I've got some demons I'm still working on.

Sometimes I cry.

For no good reason.

I have a hard time with certain things. The movie Into The Wild. The movie Elizabetown. Some songs. Some thoughts and places and things.

I'm kinda crazy, really. I mean that in the best possible way.

Please text me every day. But not too much. Don't be needy. But need me. Want me. But not too much. Be a temptation and a challenge. But don't play too hard to get. I'm interested but guarded. Quick to judge. Quick to dismiss. Even if I really like you. Even if I have thought about you often over the past 1 1/2 years. Even if you broke my heart. Damn you. But I still like you. But not enough to date you. Apparently. You've ruined that.

But I'm still into you. What do I do with that?

Man, this Blog just took a left turn in to nowhere.

Love, who can understand it?

My life should be a movie.

How can you choose between two people who are so similar? One is new, refreshing, interesting, disengaged and the other...

Familiar, comfortable, interesting, growing, abounding, future wide open... equally disengaged... how do I manage to attract these guys????